I sit here, on the eve of the last exam of my undergraduate degree, not feeling like I thought I would feel. Part of me is relieved to be done, but the majority of me is terrified of what is to come. Not terrified that I have to become an adult, or start a career, or pay back my school loans. I am terrified because, for the first time in my life, I will have to rely fully on my creativity.
Until now, everything I have created has been as a "student". It seems like that has been a crutch for me, an excuse for mediocrity. No longer. I am now able to say I am a "professional". I am so excited, and at the same time terrified. I will finally be free to pursue my dreams and aspirations without the limits that I feel school has placed on me. I have grown so much as an artist during my time in this city, over the past year especially. However, I feel like nothing will be able to prepare me for the changes that are to come. The trials that are about to shape me and define me will be tough. I am sure that I will, more than once, almost reach the point of breaking. But with my amazing family and friends I will persevere and accomplish my dreams.
Just like at numerous other times in my life, I will turn these inevitable hard times into inspiration. Not forgetting that inspiration can also come from the happy moments, which are the moments I most look forward to - and are also the moments that I remember the most, because they are so rare.
I have spent the past four years working towards this end. I will be receiving my honours degree in Media Arts and Cultures from the University of New Brunswick - and be the first student to ever complete the honours program. I have learned a lot during my time at this school. My professors have mentored me, and taught me how to critically examine and question the different forms of media around me. The people I have worked with at UNB Media Services over the past two yeas have given the practical experience of creating the media which I had been taught to question. Unlike many of my classmates, I have experienced both sides of the coin.
I plan on chronicling my journey through this blog, and sharing it with the world. I want to write about what inspires me, show how my process is developing, share images I find beautiful, update about jobs I am working on, and anything else I damn well please. Why? Because creativity is not something that should be kept private. I do this in the hopes of perhaps inspiring others.
LANCE KENNETH BLAKNEY