Lance Kenneth Blakney
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drops of gold.

These photos were taken with a simple setup in my dining room with two gelled speedlites against a medium-grey paper backdrop. The orange spot was controlled with home-made cardboard barn doors, and was aimed directly at the subject. The blue gel was shot through a medium soft box. You can see the lighting diagram here. Sometimes the simplest setup can render the greatest results. 

Subject: April Marie

A second lighting setup with one soft box off camera left, and a small silver reflector off camera right to fill in the shadows:

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the reset button.

a self-portrait.

Why I almost quit photography…

To put it simply: I was a victim of self doubt. When people ask me why my Instagram feed disappeared, I jokingly respond with “I had an existential crisis”. But, the fact is, that’s the truth. I think being in a constant state of self-loathing comes with the territory of being an artist - however, it is not healthy to rely on that excuse for long. I needed a break to recharge and reevaluate. Hating your work own work can become exhausting.

I was a victim of self doubt. But, it's time to shift perspectives.

A friend asked me why I liked taking photos. At first, I had no idea how to respond. I hadn’t thought about it in a very long time. I had been too busy trying to make photos that would make other people happy - and in the process, I forgot why I picked up a camera in the first place. After a moment of reflection, I said: 

“ I like taking pictures of people. I like showing someone a side of themselves that they didn’t know was there - or that they forgot was there. When I show them the picture... I live for that sparkle in their eye when they see themselves in a way they might not have thought possible.”

I surprised myself by saying that out loud, and realizing how far off track I felt I had become. To feel untalented is one thing - but to realize you have creatively betrayed yourself is truly heartbreaking. 

I know this is a daily struggle for so many of my creative friends. So, I just want to remind you to not be so hard on yourself. I think we have to remember to allow ourselves room to grow and explore, without putting ourselves in a tiny little box. I was feeling trapped in a box, so I decided to hit the reset button. 

What happens now…

If you’ve stuck around this long on my creative journey, I just want to say THANK YOU. All of the encouragement and unconditional support means the world to me - even when it seems like I had disappeared for a while. Starting with a clean slate, I will be posting some of my favourite photos from the last couple years as well as creating new content -  while exploring new styles, mediums, and techniques. 2018 will be a creative year of self-love and self-exploration. I am excited to start this new journey with all of you!!

xLKB 

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barista brian.
“Sometimes I dream a sentence and write it down. It’s usually nonsense, but sometimes it seems a key to another world.” - Anne Carson, Autobiography of Red

It's funny.... whenever I am feeling creatively drained or defeated, the right people come into my life and help me feel rejuvenated. This was an incredible experience because it allowed me to try things that I may not have otherwise been allowed to try - some ideas in my head that I was never quite sure if they would work. And, of course, they turned into some of my favourite photos to date.

All of these photos were shot in one session, in one general location, all within in a couple of hours. It was a fun challenge to see how many different looks we could create in a short amount of time. This was truly an amazing collaboration with some amazingly talented individuals, and I am so happy with the outcome!

model: Brian Leonard

stylist / MUA: Autumn Smith

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